"Slowly, slowly - pole, pole" - the words of the Swahili-speaking guides taking Sarah de Lagarde and her husband up Mount Kilimanjaro in 2022 proved to be profoundly impactful in rebuilding her life after she was hit by two Underground trains at High Barnet station.
Speaking at the FT Adviser Financial Advice Forum in London today (September 24), de Lagarde spoke openly and movingly about how she had to make a stark choice each day as she began her path to recovery.
"You can look into the abyss, and get sucked into the darkness, the bitterness, the unfairness of it all. Or you can choose to focus on the positive, on hope, on how to build gratitude each day", she told delegates.
She told her story simply: "I slipped and fell onto the tracks. There was nobody to hear me cry out for help." One train hit her and she lost her arm. The second train came through and severed her leg.
Throughout the ordeal, de Lagarde remained conscious.
She said: "After the second train I knew what it felt like to be dying - to feel that ice block in my chest. I had a choice then to lean into this feeling, and let it envelop me, but then I saw the faces of my two children and heard them pleading for me to come home.
De Lagarde, who died 10 times on the operating table as surgeons fought to save her life, has described herself as "80 per cent human, 20 per cent bionic".
"In that moment I remembered the lessons I had learned in my work life, of remaining calm in crisis management, and remembered the lessons our guides had told us just a month before when we were going up Kilimanjaro. Pole pole - slowly, slowly. I chose then to be calm and to fight."
Just a month after coming down from Mt Kilimanjaro, de Lagarde became a double amputee, losing her right arm and her right leg after the accident, and suffering from PTSD. But the lessons she has learned has helped her to reach out to others, becoming a motivational speaker and social media influencer.
While she is full of life, beauty and humour, radiating positivity, she opened up about her dark days, telling delegates that navigating crises like this is not easy.
"Some days are not good days. Some days are much tougher than others". She explained there will be times when she gets frustrated because she cannot do simple things the way she used to. "I can't put my earrings on by myself. I find it hard to do up my dresses.
"But one of the things I have learned is how to ask for help. It is not weakness to ask for help; it is important to accept it."
She encouraged attendees not to be afraid to be vulnerable, whether that is professional therapy or simply asking for reasonable adjustments in the office. "Acceptance is a huge step forward in building resilience", she said.
